Comments on: The Best of Intentions

By: Lut C.

Lut C. — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 20:36:20 +0000

It doesn't end when you do get PG after ART. Then you better forget all about the misery that came before and believe two pink lines/12 week milestone means take-home-baby-guaranteed. I landed here from the crème de la crème list by the way. .-= Lut C.´s last blog ..Opening doors =-.

By: Christina

Christina — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 02:04:30 +0000

I’m sorry you’ve heard these things, but I’m glad you spoke up about it.

It’s not the same category of suckiness, but I related because I’m told the same types of things after every break-up, when I didn’t get the job I wanted, when my car breaks down, etc.

You were brave and said something. I just grit my teeth and try to ignore. Maybe one day soon I’ll have the gumption to speak up, too.

By: Allie

Allie — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 19:15:03 +0000

I think judging other people’s decisions/issues in regards to having children is pretty much the ultimate no no. Totally different situation, but I have a BIG situation where people feel inclined to chime in with well-meaning, but soul-crushing wisdom and statements and it’s so hard to take it as them being nice when it just makes me feel more alone and misunderstood. I won’t pretend to know what you’re going through, but I’m thinking lots of good thoughts for you and Ted.
.-= Allie´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – November =-.

By: MinD

MinD — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 23:28:13 +0000

People have seriously said “it’s not the end of the world”? That’s so mean! How can anyone not see that?

I certainly hope I’m not guilty, or even close (but I might be, sorry…) to any of those. And I’ll be honest, I have only one friend who has dealt with infertility, but her issue is something completely different (her eggs don’t drop). Yet I know how it bugs her when people say things like these without thinking, or even with the best intentions. I’m glad you wrote this though. I’m sure it educated many of us on things we didn’t even realize we might be doing.
.-= MinD´s last blog ..He’s heeeeeeere! =-.

By: Lacey Bean

Lacey Bean — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 15:20:16 +0000

LOVE YOU!! And want a wine shot? That should be on your list of favorite things people say to you. Just putting it out there.
.-= Lacey Bean´s last blog .."That thong th thong thong thong!" =-.

By: steph anne

steph anne — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 23:12:55 +0000

I’m probably guilty of this… as I never really know what to say. I’m just really grateful we are all here for you and part of your support system.
.-= steph anne´s last blog ..Protected: Moving On & Trying Not To Look Back… =-.

By: Jessica

Jessica — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 02:11:51 +0000

I had to think for a while before commenting because I honestly wasn't very sure what to say. I have a really awful feeling I may have said one of these things to you, really with the best of intentions, so now i feel like an asshole. But the one thing that doesn't change is how much I do love you. .-= Jessica´s last blog ..Weekend recap: Beer, football and blue eyes =-.

By: Walter

Walter — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 01:26:25 +0000

I’m much more hurt of the remarks other people make than my wife. I can’t believe how people can be insensitive and nosy. My wife can’t conceive and I hate it when people say “encouraging” words.

Most of the time, silence is more eloquent than speech.

By: Rebekah

Rebekah — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 01:20:04 +0000

All I can ever think to say in time like this, when I have never been in a similar situation and can’t imagine even trying to relate, is OH, SH*T. That’s just all that comes out. I’m glad you chose to put this post out there, to help people understand what we couldn’t even guess without being in your spot. Love you, dear, and sending you hugs )

By: marty

marty — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 22:59:53 +0000

I just wanted to say, WORD.

We don’t have the same problem – I get pregnant easily (three times this year) and miscarry just as easily (three times this year). But the outcome is still the same, right?

I would add to the bad list:
- “It’ll happen when it’s meant to happen.” HURL.

And to the good list:
- “This isn’t your fault, and you’re making the best decisions you can with the information you have. I have faith that it will work out for you.”
.-= marty´s last blog ..Somebody alert the FCC =-.